Out of Mouth of Babes

Holding Baby Girl today, I commented on how skinny and tiny she was.

Me:  "You're too skinny.  You need to eat more food."

Her:  "If I eat a lot of food, I'll get fat and have to ride a scooter."

I think she discovered the meaning of life. 

Boyfriends

When you have pretty girls, they're going to have boyfriends.  Try explaining that to my overprotective husband without him losing all restraint.

A boy from school decided to make Big Sis his girlfriend.  She agreed.  I tried not to make it a big deal because, even at this young age, I want her to feel comfortable discussing relationships with me. I would have rather died than to talk to my mom about a boy I liked.  The notes this boy sent her were enough to cause a serious rise in blood pressure (in her father)!  Even though he told her he loved her more than he would probably love any other person, he dumped her after two weeks.  I asked her what she said when he did it.  She told me, "I just said OK."  She demonstrated by shrugging her shoulders.  That's my girl...don't let them loser guys get you down!  He's already moved on to a new chick.  Playa.  It's probably because she told him no when he asked to hold her hand.  Again, that's my girl!!!


Baby Girl has had a boyfriend for a year or more now.  It's her brother's best friend.  He's 7 years older than she is and is as sweet as sugar to her.  If we ever take him anywhere with us, he holds her hand as we walk through the parking lot.  He's never acted embarrassed of this little girl who's smitten with him.  She tells everyone that she loves Brevan.  At church last weekend, I asked her if Clayton was her new boyfriend.  She's been showing him a lot of attention and asks to sit with and play with him.  She replied, "I have lots of boyfriends...Brevan, Dad, Jesus...lots of boyfriends!"  Good, I thought, as long as Dad and Jesus are listed in there, we're going to be just fine!

Conversations

Things Heard Around My House Lately:

(Note:  My words are in green while Baby Girl's are in purple.)

"You shouldn't read the Bible on the toilet."
"I'm gonna be like Daddy."

~^~

"You have a headache? I'm gonna cut you."

(Baby Girl was actually being sypathetic, not psycho-killer-like. She was holding a plastic tea set knife and was kind of scratching her brother's back with it.)

~^~

(As Baby Girl was carrying her brother's play sword up the steps, I doubted her need for it.)

"I don't think you need to be playing with that sword."
"Yes I do.  It's my granddaughter's sword."
"It's your granddaughter's sword?"
"Yep."

~^~

"I'm gonna call da police.  You're goin' to jail."

"I'm going to jail?  Have I been a bad girl?"
"Yep."
"Well, I'm going to miss you when I'm in jail.  Will you miss me?"
"Nope."  (Picks up my cell phone and pushes a couple buttons.)  "Hello, police?  Mommy needs to go to jail.  OK, bye."
"Goodbye, I'll miss you."
"I miss you too, Mommy."  (Gives me a hug and a kiss.)

~^~

Only half-heartedly listening, I heard Baby Girl say something to the effect of:
Is my daddy going to fix the car?
Yes.
My black daddy?  (She had my attention now.)
Your daddy is black?
Yes.
Oh, OK.  What color am I?
Green.
I'm green?  What color are you then?
Heart.
Heart?
Yeah.  I have hearts on my shirt.
OK, I get it now.

Never Too Young

Baby Girl has started asking me to take pictures.  I think it's a great idea!  I place the strap over her neck, make sure her finger is positioned above the button, and step back to have my photo taken.  The cool thing is that she usually gets me in the picture!  (That might be partly because I move around to make sure I'm standing- or squatting- in front of the lens!)

Maybe we have a future photographer here!  I've certainly gotten worse shots on vacation when I ask strangers to take our picture!!!

Here is her work thus far:  (Some are better than others!)

Silly Girl

I've been losing track of all the cute things Baby Girl has done lately so I thought it was time to get some jotted down. 

She started a new game of "Catch, Mommy."  She starts two rooms away, which is the longest stretch of open space in our home.  Holding her lovely, dear puppy, she says, "Catch, Mommy" as she whips it into the air.  Of course, she's about twenty feet too far away and the puppy lands inches from her feet.   She scoops it up, moves forward and says, "Catch, Mommy!"  The game continues on this way until she's a foot in front of my face, which the puppy eventually slams into.  (This game is much more fun for her than it is for me.)

~~~~~

"Guess what?  I have a question to you!  I eat all my toast!"

~~~~~

While coloring...
Baby Girl:  Mommy...
Me:  What?
Baby Girl:  I'm pretty.
Me:  (chuckle) Yes, you are!

~~~~~

When she is frustrated at me, she calls me Sugar.  I don't think she realizes it's a term of affection.

Baby Girl Strikes Again

In honor of her third birthday, I thought I would share some cute things my little monkey has done lately.

Baby Girl can spell her name now. 
"B - I - J - 7."  I'm so proud.

~~~~~

Everything right now is "I know."  But the bad thing is, she doesn't seem to know what I know means.  For example:
-Baby, you're not allowed to chew gum.
-I know.
-Throw it in the trash.
-I KNOW!
(She wanders away, still chewing gum.)

~~~~~

Son #2 wanted to trade in his old DS for an iPod Touch.  He's been saving for a while.  Unfortunately, Baby Girl broke his DS.  Only the bottom screen has been working so they said they'd give him $20 for it.  I thought that for $20, I'll just keep it and make it her Game Boy.  So we've been letting her play with it.  She threw it down a full flight of steps and it started working again.  Go figure.

~~~~~

At breakfast yesterday, Baby Girl had cereal.  Then she wanted crackers.  Then she asked for "Ha-corn."  That is her word for popcorn.  "I don't have any popcorn," I told her.  "Hacorn!  Hacorn!" she adamantly demanded.  "I'm sorry, I don't have any popcorn."  She grabbed my pinkie finger, "I show you."  She led me to the cereal cupboard and pointed at the box of Pop Tarts.  POPcorn...POPtarts...I see the connection now.  She broke her Pop Tart into pieces and then asked to watch "Prince an a Beas."  (Beauty and the Beast.)

~~~~~

She has been anticipating her birthday for some time now.  On her actual birthday, she kept saying it was her cousin's birthday instead.  She said she wanted a cake with fire (candles).  At her party last night, she was most excited about singing Happy Birthday before blowing out the candles.  She sang the entire song to herself.  It was so precious.  Her favorite gift was princess fruit snacks.

She makes like just a bit more pleasant.

Silly Baby

Baby Girl has been on a roll lately with humorous phrases and sayings.  She has been calling everyone Mr. Potter, which is the name of the old man across the street.  When she wakes up in the morning, she looks at me and says, "Hello, Mr. Potter!"  If someone is standing up at a restaurant, she says, "Sit down, Mr. Potter!"  It comes across really funny.

In the car this past Saturday, Son #2 had one of Baby Girl's toys.  She can't just calmly ask for anything.  Instead, she said, "Give it to me right now!  1, 2, 3...that's it!  You're getting a pankin, bad girl!"  We laughed and laughed so hard that Hubby had a hard time keeping the car on the road!

Everything right now is "poo-poo" with Baby Girl.  She finds that word extremely hilarious.  She calls people poo-poo, she talks about poo-poo and she sings about poo-poo.  For example:  Row, row, row your boat, gently down the poo-poo!

While chatting with her dad on the phone, I heard him ask, "Where's your mom?"  Her reply was "At the hopspital."  Quite an imagination...

She is also into hiding from Monters right now.  I think her brothers started her on that one.  They learned that she'll snuggle up next to them under a blanket if they make a game out of it.  Cheap trick to try to get a hug, if you ask me.  (Yes, I've done it too.)

She is also really into Cheese Touch right now.  If you have any children who have read the Wimpy Kid books, you'll know what I'm talking about.  If she's not giving you the Cheese Touch, she's karate chopping you with the sound effect "ka KA!"  (Also thanks to The Brothers.)

I just adore her personality and the fact that she makes me laugh every day.  All my kids have different strengths...she's tied for first with Son #1 for sense of humor.  He kept us rolling on the floor as a toddler too.  I love a home full of laughter!

Popsicles and Backseat Driving

I'm sure everyone thinks their kids are hilarious but I seriously have one of the funniest kids I've ever met!  This child is sure to grow up to be a comedian or have some career related to humor!  First of all, she picked out this outfit today.  Isn't that funny as it is?  She also looks amazingly patriotic.

• Baby Girl loves popsicles, as seen in this pic.  The only reason I give her as many as I do is because she calls them "pockables."  That's just too cute to resist!
• Just a moment ago, she came up and asked me for a pockable.  I told her she needed to give me a kissy lips first.  "Mmm-wah!" she said as she blew me a kiss.  "No, I need a kiss on the lips!"  She sighed just like a teenage girl.  "OK, I give you one kiss but the pockable is beary, beary, beary cold!"  Alright, makes perfect sense to me.
• Baby Girl has recently become a backseat driver.  Whenever I'm stopped at a red light or waiting to pull into traffic, she will exclaim in a very bossy manner, "Go!"  I've tried explaining that I have to wait my turn but she just doesn't get it.
• When Hubby was driving the other day, he was loudly singing along with the radio.  She suddenly declared, "That's enough, Bob!"  We laughed so hard we almost wet ourselves.  She loved the attention and now says, "That's enough, Bob!" all the time!
• When she wakes up in the morning, she will play in her bed or call my name until I come get her out of bed.  When I open her door, she offers a cheery, "Ello, puppet!" in her best British accent.
• This morning after breakfast, she told her brother, "You smell like poop.  I don't like poop."  I have no idea what sparked that topic but no one smelled like poop to me.
• A tradition with my girls is that I daily ask them what their names are.  They sometimes come up with something funny or clever, other times they just give me their full name.  Lately, when I ask Baby Girl what her name is, she says, "Baby and I glad."  I'm not sure if she actually knows what glad means but I'm happy that she is glad.

She makes life much more interesting!

"Wook at me, Mom!"

Dancing with a jump rope

Baby Girl has become quite the show-off lately.  Any time I try to concentrate on anything, from eating, to blogging, to cooking, I hear, "Wook at me, Mom!"  I look over to see her do some sort of trick.  Just a moment ago, she was standing in the doorway, legs apart, with her feet touching each side of the door frame.  I simply could not be more proud.



My mom has a little play house for the kids.  Baby Girl isn't content to simply play in the house.  She prefers to climb on top of it.  "Wook at me, Mom!"  Big Sis has actually started to get a little jealous, I think.  She copied her baby sister and climbed on top of the house with  her.  Instead, she was scolded and told to get down.  She's not as monkey-like as the Baby and will probably fall off and break a bone.  (I can make fun because she rightly earned her clumsiness from yours truly.)

It would be so much easier to throw an uncaring glance her way while mustering a quick, "Good job," every time she asks me to wook at her.  But I know she won't be showing off for me forever.  I would be thrilled for Son #1 to do a trick to try to impress me.  But impressing your mom isn't at the top of a 12-year old's list.  So I need to savor every moment, enjoy every dance, and wook at her as much as I can.

Too Hard

Everything with Baby Girl right now is "I can't," or "It too hard."  Who knew laziness could strike at such a young and innocent age?  It must be her 12-year old brother wearing off on her as he nears the lazy teenage years.

She was whining this morning that she wanted to go outside.  That is a whole other battle.  She wants to be outside constantly.  She is only allowed out with her brothers or me.  Big Sis isn't quite grounded enough to keep an eye on her.  Since we live on the same side of the street as three other family members, she has acres to explore and discover.  So while she was begging to go outside, I told her she had to clean up her Legos first.  (This future architect strews Legos and building blocks around the house multiple times each day.  It's time that she starts cleaning them up by herself.)  I was met with the answer.  "It too hard." 

Trying to bring out the peppy, good mom who is somewhere inside me, I said, "No, it's not too hard.  You can do it.  Do you need some encouragement?"  She shook her head yes.  I began chanting, "Go, baby, go!  Go, baby, go!"  It worked.  She was like a runner who got her second wind after hitting a wall.  She started picking up Legos with a big grin on her face.  But, being the monkey she is, she was picking them up with her feet, not her hands.  I ran to get the camera and started snapping pictures, despite the unclothed state she was in. 

I left to return my camera to the bag and noticed that the exuberant clean up project was slowing down. 

5 minutes later, it had ceased completely. 

So right now, she is upstairs, playing and yelling at one of her siblings.  She thinks she won this battle, but my little monkey will not be going outside until she picks up the Legos.  I'm standing firm on this one.

Cute Kid Sayings

Baby Girl calls this "Pepper-Oni" instead of Macaroni.

As she was drawing a picture, I told Baby Girl to write her name.  Making one small mark at a time, she said, "I...love...you...eleven...twelve...firteeen."

When you give her something, Baby Girl replies, "Thank you much!" with exuberant expression.

Big Sis was talking about her upcoming birthday.  She was planning what kind of cake she wanted and suggested a purse.  "I can do that, I think," was my answer.  She replied, "Well, yeah!  It's just a trapezoid or a rectangular prism!"  (Those are NOT words I taught her.)

Baby Girl told us she wanted "Eggo." The brothers disagreed about what this meant. #1 said she wanted eggs. #2 suggested maybe it was a waffle she was craving. But Mama understands all things and figured out she wanted to watch DIEGO on TV.

I decided I'm cool enough.  I broke down and ordered some Tom's.  Big Sis called them Papa shoes.  They're exactly the kind of shoes my dad uses to work in the shop.  Except for the fact that he gets his for $8 at Wal-Mart.

A Concert in Monkey Jammies

I know she's not your kid but I though this was too cute not to post.  It's an evening performance by Baby Girl atop a box of Target diapers.  Yes, I can actually understand what she's saying.  My favorite line is "Foreber, opper uh da nation."

Conversations with Baby Girl

-What have supper night?
-What are we having for supper tonight?  Ribs.
-I no like dat.
-What do you want for supper tonight?
-Meat
-OK, we'll have meat.  With barbecue sauce on it.
-O-tay.
-Are you gonna eat it?
-Nope.

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-"You're precious!" I told her the other day.

-"I not precious.  I pretty!" was her reply.

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I was helping her go potty this morning when she suddenly exclaimed, "I have dia-REE-ah!"  She didn't, but
she must have learned a new word. 

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It took us about a week to figure out what she wanted when she said she wanted to watch "Bus." I racked my brain...did we have any videos with school buses on them? Maybe trains...is she confused? No, she didn't want Chuggington or Choo Choo Soul. As I was scrolling through the DVR menu, she suddenly stopped me and yelled, "Bus!" It was The Wizard of Oz. Then I figured out how she got "Bus" out of that. She left off the words "The Wizard." So she was saying "Of Oz." But she can't say "of." She says, "ub." So then the title became "Ub Os," because she can't make a Z sound yet. So this is how we got "Bus" out of The Wizard of Oz. I'm just glad I finally figured it out! I think it's because I'm starting to think like a 2-year-old.

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-What supper night?  (This is the new thing she asks every day.)
-Paprikash.
-Pepper Couch?
-Yes, Pepper Couch.  Do you like that?
-YES!

Reasoning with a 2-year-old

"Who gave you that sucker?"

"Baby."

"Baby gave you that sucker?"

"Yesh!"

"Baby is not allowed to give you suckers.  Mama has to give you suckers."

{adorable grin}

"Well, you can keep it if you let me take your picture."

"O-tay!"

-ten minutes have passed-

"Where's your sucker?"

"I eat it."

"Where's the stick?"

"I eat it."

"You ate the stick?"

"Yesh."

"Where's the sucker stick that you hold with your hand?"

"I put it da ploor."

"You put it on the floor?  Pick it up and put it in the trash."

"No, I put it da ploor.  I watch Dritch."

"You can watch Grinch when you throw your stick in the trash."

"O-TAY!"

I guess that wasn't too bad.

She got a sucker and I got ten quiet minutes while she ate it.

"Dritch"

Baby Girl is totally obsessed with "The Dritch" right now.  The first time she asked to watch it, I spent half the day trying to figure out what she wanted.  But while I was scrolling through the DVR playlist, she stopped me and said, "Dritch!"  There was a little picture in the upper left hand corner that she recognized.  I didn't know Baby Girl even knew who The Grinch was.  But now she wants to watch it every day....multiple times every day!  The other kids are getting sick of only watching The Grinch, yet they continue to sit with her day after day watching it.  I know Christmas is long gone but I really need to find a stuffed Grinch somewhere.  Maybe I'll check eBay or Amazon.

Cute Kid Sayings

• When I offer Baby Girl something to eat, she often replies, "I can't like it."
• I love how Big Sis answers the question, "What time is it?"  She says, "Six dot dot two three."  Once, I explained that she doesn't have to say the dot dot part.  Then I quickly changed my mind and told her I was wrong.  Dot dot is very necessary (and adorable).
• When I ask Baby Girl a question but she can't hear me well, she calls out, "What, Honey?"
• For some reason, the word "sure" comes out "surp" when Baby Girl says it.  "Will you bring me your cup?" I ask.  "Surp," she replies.  I always think she's saying syrup.
• While watching TV together, Baby Girl kept going from person to person, pinching our cheeks affectionately.  When I asked her what she was doing, she said, "I being precious!"

School Days Fashion Show

Every morning when we drive Brother and Sissy to school, Baby Girl thinks she's going too.  One morning, she was so convinced she was going that she bawled when I wouldn't let her out of her car seat.  "I go Cool!  I go Cool!" she insisted.  If I would have let her out, she would have walked up the sidewalk, into the school, and likely found a seat next to her sister in First Grade.  She just does not understand why she has to be so much younger than everyone else.  Here are a few of the going-to-school outfits she put together herself:

Outfit #1:

Big Sister's red church coat, magenta stocking hat, one borrowed pink boot, and Disney Princess umbrella

Outfit #2:

Red and pink polka-dot pajamas, brown puffy coat, Big Sister's pink crocheted boots, and hot pink Dora backpack.  

Outfit #3:

Brown polka-dot shirt, gray sweat pants, Brother's black and white striped stocking hat, Big Sister's black patent boots, pink Hello Kitty lunch box, and black Hello Kitty messenger bag (for supplies, I assume)









Outfit #4:
Christmas Monkey pajama top, backwards jeans, Daddy's XL black puffy coat, and a huge smile!

 



Growing Up

Baby Girl has learned how to put her hands in her pockets. I think it's adorable to watch her walk around the house like this.

She has become quite independent lately...probably ever since potty training. If I try to help her do anything, her response is, "I DO IT!" From putting on her coat to pulling up her pants, she wants no help at all. She will spin in a circle trying to put her second arm in her coat. She looks like a cartoon dog chasing his tail. Yesterday, she spun for so long that she got dizzy and fell into the corner of the wall. That wasn't fun.

When she woke up today, she was very grouchy. I tried various techniques to make a grumpy baby smile to no avail. Finally, she looked at me and sternly said, "SUT UP!" My mouth dropped open at the surprise of such harsh words from my sweet, tiny girl. She's joined the others now...she's no longer a sweet baby. She's a grown kid.

But she has definitely learned her manners. It's so sweet to hear her say, "Dank You," when you hand her a napkin. She delicately wipes her face then continues on making a mess with her applesauce.

Driving Me Crazy

Parenting a toddler tests one's sanity like few other experiences in life. Here is my list of how Baby Girl is driving me crazy today.

• Indecisiveness

This child is not capable of making a simple decision. She demonstrates this most often at breakfast time.
- "Which kind of cereal do you want?" I ask.
- "Kind," she replies while pointing to a box. So I pour that kind into a bowl and set it on a table.
- "Poon." Of course she needs a spoon...no problem.
- "No, not DAT kind."
- "Great, now you tell me. What kind do you want now?"
- "Kind," she replies while pointing to another box. Depending on my patience level that particular morning, sometimes I oblige, sometimes not. You see, this child rarely eats. She is in the fifth percentile for her weight. So any time she shows interest in eating, even sugar cereal, we usually jump to meet her demands. But today, I gave her three choices of cereal before she decided not to eat any. Ugh!

• Refusal to Swallow

Over the past week or so, Baby Girl has decided to hold the last bite of every meal in her mouth for an indefinite amount of time. She won't open her mouth or speak while the last bite lingers and she refuses to swallow. It usually results in a disgusting blog being spit in my bathroom sink. But today, she must have had a little tickle in her nose before she was able to spit. So she sneezed the partly digested final bite all over me. Ugh! (You will be thankful that I chose not to post a picture of this particular frustration.)

• Forceful Urination

New to pottying, Baby Girl still doesn't have complete bladder control. Sometimes she pees so forcefully that the urine comes up and over the toilet seat, running down the sides of the bowl and forms a puddle on the floor. This, mixed with the occasional accidents she still has, has me cleaning up urine far too often. Ugh! Thank God for Lysol wipes!

• Hair Curiosity

Baby Girl was not overly blessed in the hair department. Her hair comes just to the base of her neck and barely covers her ears. So she is very interested in her sister's waist-long, beautiful hair. So much so that she has taken to pulling the snot out of it lately. Every once in a while, I hear a scream followed by, "Baby, NO!" I run to find a grinning and happy Baby Girl with two handfuls of a crying Big Sis' hair. She only lets go when I pry her tiny, strong hands open. Ugh!

I think I need a vacation.

Potty Obsession

Baby Girl is totally obsessed with toileting and every aspect of it. She loves sitting on the pot and would have no problem doing it for 20-30 minutes every time.

She loves wiping. I guess this is an activity I've taken for granted as I have never quite found pleasure in it. But she has. She loves unwinding the toilet paper roll and tearing it off. And, of course, she wants no help.

Then comes the flushing. What could be more exciting than the loud KAWOOSH and watching "the business" swirl down the drain?

And to top it all off, she gets to climb on top of a cute, little, pink stool and play in water- another activity she would gladly spend thirty minutes doing.

But the only part of toileting she does not enjoy is the putting back on of the panties. She much prefers the freedom of running around with a bare tooshie. So I get to see a lot of tiny, naked butt these days. Oh, the joy of kids growing up!