America, Stuff Your Faces!

What is it about a pizza buffet that lets you see the true colors of different folks?  We stopped in at a local pizza restaurant for lunch over the weekend.  It's a chain restaurant, independently owned.  They recently added a buffet so we thought we'd give it a try.  For some reason, Hubby chose a table right next to the buffet table.  That wouldn't have been my choice because we were then forced to watch middle-class America overindulge in an All You Can Eat special. People behaved as if they hadn't eaten in weeks.  (And judging by their appearance, I can pretty confidently say that wasn't the case.)  Plates were filled so high with salad, then garlic bread, and topped off with a couple slices of pizza.  And no, this wasn't a one trip only buffet.

I had to stand in line and wait behind a woman who used the (probably filthy) spatula to obtain the center two pieces of  the round garlic bread pie.  She turned to me, smiled, and said "I like the middle pieces."  All I could reply was, "Oh yeah?"  I would have rather said, "Looks to me like you like an awful lot of things here.  Your plate is piled so high that one more item might cause the entire structure to crash to the ground!"  But I didn't.

And then halfway through our meal, a door on the side of the dining room opened and the manager's family emerged.  (We've seen them before at different events so knew who they were.)  They were dirty, unkempt, and half asleep.  Looking through the door, we saw a mildewy basement where this family apparently lived.  It was quite a sad sight.  I wondered about the three pudgy little girls whose hair hadn't been combed in a while.  Was pizza their primary food staple in life?  Is that all they ever ate?  Come to think of it, the family has been there every time we've eaten there.  Now it makes sense- they live there!  I really felt sorry for the kids...what a life!

By the end of the meal, I think we determined to never dine there again.  Very few things about the experience were enjoyable.  Good thing I don't write restaurant reviews!

We left the restuarant to see the most enjoyable part of the meal.  Parked outside was one of those huge stationwagons you know your parents drove in the 70s or 80s.  The vanity license plate read "GRSWOLD."  If you know me well enough to know how big of a Christmas Vacation (and Wally World) fan I am, you will understand why this tickled me to the point of laughing out loud.  Good ending to a not-so-good afternoon.

More Pet Peeves

I know you just love to hear me complain.  Here are some more things that get under my skin.  Feel free to chime in with yours today.

• Getting 50 text messages a day that simply say "OK."  I hate getting up from my lunch, going in to find my phone because I can't remember where I left it to find a text that says "OK." 
• Someone who literally overuses the word literally.  "It's literally one thousand degrees in here!"  Is it?  Is that even possible?  I literally don't think you know what "literally" means.
• When someone folds a piece of paper in half then uses their fingernail to make the crease.  Eek...it's like fingernails on a chalkboard to me!
• Again, I must mention people who don't use their turn signals.  One of these days I just might plow right into the back of them.
• Dirty socks on the bathroom, living room, dining room, or kitchen floor.
• Missing coupon expiration dates.  I lost a $10 Best Buy rewards coupon and a Shutterfly coupon code because I let the expiration dates pass.  Boo!
• Forgetting my coupons when shopping.  I recently spent $30 at Bath & Body Works, remembering that I had a dandy coupon at home.  I don't know why I don't take them with me at all times.
• An empty iced tea pitcher in the refrigerator when I'm thirsty.
• Negative people who always see the grass as greener on the other side.  Just keep your own grass green and quit looking at your neighbor's!

Pet Peeves

A lot of things have been bugging me lately...maybe I'm just getting older and grumpier.

My Pet Peeves

• At the top of the list is a grammatical pet peeve. I hate the use of unnecessary apostrophes. The girl's gave the toy's to the kid's. I especially hate when apostrophes are used improperly on signage: Luigi's, The Best Pizza's in Town. Please have someone proofread a sign in which you are investing big money.
• Chain emails, email forwards, text forwards, and Facebook post forwards. 97% of people won't have the guts to repost this. Really? Did you do scientific studies on that? My guess is that you randomly picked a number close to 100. If you have the best spouse in the world, forward this to show your love. Nah, my spouse is only the 2nd best spouse in the world. So I'd better pass.
• People who do NOT use their turn signals. Why? How hard is it to push that little stick down to let me know you're going to turn? No, you would rather stop suddenly in the middle of the street and slowly begin your turn into a driveway. Maybe you should put down your cell phone and stop texting long enough to use a turn signal.
• People who don't return their carts at the grocery store but instead shove them toward the cart return dock from a great distance. I was recently walking to my car at the store when I saw a woman shove her cart from about 20 feet away. Of course, my car was parked a couple spots down. The cart took a turn and slammed right into my vehicle. She noticed, grabbed the cart, and shoved it in the cart dock. No, she did not check for damage. With a snotty attitude, I proclaimed, "Actually, that's MY car." She one-upped me with attitude and answered me "It's FINE." I asked if she would mind if I checked first and she acted like I totally put her out. (It was fine but that's not the point!)
• The neighbors who insist on parking right at the bottom of my driveway. Our side of the street is not known for simple driveways. We sit at the top of a hill and have windy, steep driveways. The neighbors could park in front of their house but they choose not to. They like parking right at the bottom of my driveway. So when it's icy in the winter, we have to drive like we're avoiding land mines to miss slamming right into their car.
• People who go out in public wearing their pajamas. I don't live in the classiest of towns and I'm aware of that. Actually, I'm reminded of that every time I go grocery shopping. There will always be one low-class loser who must grocery shop right after rolling out of bed. If they can't change their clothes, is there any way they brushed their teeth or put on deodorant?
• People in my family who do not push their chair into the table when they're done eating. Actually, I'll go ahead and throw in people in my family who do not clean up after themselves. How hard is it? I am not your maid, although I feel like it most days.
• People who litter. They should be shot.
• Political robo calls, political junk mail, political signs...if you read my post from a few days ago, you already know this.

That's all I have for now. I'll keep you posted if the level on my Grumpy Meter rises.