Embarrassing Top Ten

Monday night, Son #2 and I went to Hubby's basketball game to cheer him on.  By marital contract, I am only obligated to attend one basketball game a season.  The last game I attended, they lost and I was unimpressed.  The following game, which I did not attend, the entire gym was chanting Hubby's name and saying, "Every week, baby!"  Whatever that means.  Sitting on the bleachers at one of his games brings me back to my teenage years.  I felt like I should be wearing his jean jacket while winking at him as he runs down the court.  Now, however, I only do the latter. 

During a break in the game, the deejay started pumpin' some old school tunes.  It Takes Two was the song of choice, which made my teenage years seem even closer.  I turned to Son #2 and said, "What will you give me if I stand up and start dancing right now?"  His eyes got wide and he answered, "I will give you this iPod Touch to keep for the rest of your life."  The mischievous grin on my face suddenly caused him to change his answer.  "Never mind," he said.  I think he really thought I was capable of doing that.  (By the way, it would have taken a lot more than an iPod to tempt me to behave that way in public...but it's not an impossibility.)

I began thinking of how embarrassed my second son would have been at that sight.  (Certainly not as embarrassed as my dear husband of fifteen years.)  #2 doesn't embarrass easily, but his brother does.  I decided to come up with a Top Ten List of things I could do to embarrass my children!

10. Dancing in public.

 9. Singing in public. I actually do this one from time to time, but only in front of people they don't know.

 8. Pick them up from school in my dad's 1994 Chevy Lumina van.

 7. Leaving the house with my hair in its natural state.

 6.  Show up to a band concert, basketball game, or other event like other people in my town: in my pajamas.

 5.  While in the car with their friends, ask, "Son, did you just pass gas?"

 4. Calling out, "I LOVE YOU!" as they get out of the car for school.

 3.  Make out with their dad.

 2. In front of a cute girl, saying, "You're right, honey, she really is pretty!"

And the Number One thing I could do to embarrass my children is:
Kiss them on the lips in front of their friends. I can think of nothing worse.